If my husband refuses to have sex with me, is he still a good Christian and does God still hear his prayers?

Dear Lonely:

In reference to your question, abstinence within the bounds of marriage is a very personal issue and something that should be in agreement between both spouses and God. You see Paul the apostle specifically addressed this issue in his letter to the Corinthians. Paul states:

The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Stop depriving one another, except by agreement for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer, and come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. (1 Corinthians 7:3-5).

Paul’s statement is self-explanatory. But, I make reference to the one reason that the husband and wife abstain from one another (and only for a time): PRAYER. Communication with our Lord is one of the most important facets in a believer’s life. True devotion to the Lord, prompts continual communication with Him.

Therefore, Paul’s main point was to devote yourselves to the Lord alone, for a specified time, for the purpose of growing closer in godliness. This is very similar to fasting and prayer, and is a sacrifice of love to the Lord for the purpose of godliness. Also, make note that you must both agree on this, as you are one and are seen as one in the eyes of the Lord.

Ms Lonely, if this is not the case with you and your spouse, then I urge you to seek out the reasoning for his abstinence to you. Your question leads me to believe that there is a form of misguided communication between you and your husband. The question you ask is a result of some action or non-action between you and your husband, and herein lays the true dilemma. Though, I cannot speculate, I urge you to seek professional Christian counseling. Also, please keep in mind that you are called to respect your husband as he is called to love you (Ephesians 5:22-33).

Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband. (Ephesians 5:33)

As far as the discussion concerning his witness as a believer in Christ Jesus and his prayers to the Lord, that is a personal issue with God. Though, God says that the prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective (James 5:16). I will pray for you. Blessings. Dean.