Where in the bible does it say that man can only have one wife, if in the old testament it shows something different?

Dear Carmen:

In looking into your question between the Old Testament (OT) and the New Testament (NT), it appears that there may be a double standard. However, as we look at God’s design, we will see that there is only one standard and there has always been one standard: one husband – one wife – one God.

"Then God said, "Let Us make man in Our image, according to Our likeness… 27 And God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them." Gen 1:26-28 (NASB)

“And the LORD God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man. 23 And the man said,
"This is now bone of my bones, And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman,
Because she was taken out of Man." 24 For this cause a man shall leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave to his wife; and they shall become one flesh. 25 And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed. “
Gen 2:22-25 (NASB)

"You shall not commit adultery." Ex 20:14 (NASB)

"Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body. 24 But as the church is subject to Christ, so also the wives ought to be to their husbands in everything. 25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her; 26 that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 that He might present to Himself the church in all her glory, having no spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that she should be holy and blameless. 28 So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself; 29 for no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ also does the church, 30 because we are members of His body. 31 FOR THIS CAUSE A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER, AND SHALL CLEAVE TO HIS WIFE; AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH. 32 This mystery is great; but I am speaking with reference to Christ and the church. 33 Nevertheless let each individual among you also love his own wife even as himself; and let the wife see to it that she respect her husband." Ephesians 5:22-33 (NASB)


God’s design has always been for one man and one woman in Holy Matrimony. Marriage is designed by God for this reason. Now, I understand that many are married without understanding or trusting in God, but it remains that God created marriage, just as God created man and woman. Additionally, marriage is a love triangle, as the man and woman are one flesh united to worship the Lord, and Him alone. Understandably, humans aren’t perfect and we should not idolize or worship one another. Only the Lord is perfect and to be worshiped.

In the OT, you may see many men take more than one wife and/or have several concubines. This is true, but not the original design and in direct conflict with the seventh commandment and with God’s original design. There have been many who argue for polygamy, but God’s original design has always been one man and one woman in matrimony (Ephesians 5:22ff). Also, there have been several OT men, who took only one wife: Abraham, Moses, Job, and Hosea are just a few.

Now, let us think about this… God is love. He has created us in His image. The Bible is an instructional guide on ‘How to have a relationship with God.’ The main goal in a Jesus-husband-wife triangle is to love and worship and glorify the Lord. In turn, He will honor you (husband and wife) and bless you. (Jeremiah 29:11; Ruth).

Blessings.
Dean